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Yes, I know. I need to get better at this. This morning at my mom's morning, another mom mentioned that she was awaiting amnio results. And how she was praying for the best case scenario not the worst case. And as she sat there and was talking about it with us, I just sat there shaking my head agreeing with everything she was saying and thinking. I remember our horrible appointment that dreadful day. The doctor telling us that Caroline has short limbs, and she was probably going to be a dwarf, and me constantly repeating, "but I'm just here for my high blood pressure". I had no idea why in the world he told me she had short limbs and why he sat us in a room with a genetics counselor for her to tell us "worst case scenarios". As I sat there listening to this mom, I just wanted to scream for her. I wanted to tell her it would be alright. I wanted to tell her it was ok to be mad at God. I wanted to tell her it's not fair and that she did nothing to deserve this. I wanted to tell her it was ok to be mad at her friends for having healthy babies and that you it was normal to feel alone in this fight. I just sat there and shook my head because everything she said I remembered. The waiting on the amnio results, the constant praying and praying and telling people that you just wanted best case scenario. And dreading the phone ringing because you didn't know who was going to be on the other line. You wanted it to be your results, but you also didn't want it to be your results because you just didn't want to face your future. All day I have been thinking about this mom, praying for this mom, praying for her unborn child, and praying for her husband. Because bless his heart. I remember Web feeling helpless. He wanted to be there for me, and he definitely was, but I wasn't ready to lean on him. He was definitely my sounding board and my shoulder to cry on but I just wasn't ready for his optimism, positive attitude, and his constant reminder that we would love Caroline know matter what. After mom's morning I did tell this mom she could talk to me if she had any questions, and that I have been in her shoes of the unknown. And that she couldn't blame herself, yada yada. But after she left, I stood there and thought, you moron, that's exactly what she doesn't want to hear right now. She just wants to vent, she just wants to vomit her thoughts, she just wants it to all go away. So if anyone is reading this blog, I ask that you please pray for this mom. NO ONE knows what she is thinking or feeling but her. And for the genetics doctor who told us "worst case scenario". I would like to share this picture with you.

Caroline practicing for her dance recital. Love to all